So recently....... God's been telling me to stop looking around.
At other people and their struggles. At our country and our issues. At our history and our flaws.
I've been so wrapped up in the ugly and somber realities of life that it's like I've been deprived of all overwhelming moments of gratitude. Life's been nothing to me lately but anger and bad words and tear stains and broken families and such. I don't even know the last time I had a God-Moment. Because literally EVERY FREAKING MOMENT OF EVERY FREAKING DAY HAS BEEN A FREAKING CHLOE MOMENT. Excuse my french.
But, I think He's been telling me that I could use a good shrinking. Like, bad.
He's been screaming it in my ears and hitting me in the back of the head with it--in the best "I love you so much Chloe Alexis Hunsbarger" kind of way.
So here I am praying to be itty-bitty. Praying that He'll just break me apart. Wide open--so He can put me back together filled with more of His Goodness and Grace. Praying He'll take my ugliness and chuck it as far as the east is from the west. And finally coming to grips with the true reality of life that maybe it's time to start looking up.
So now I'm writing the same letters I was a week ago, growing out of my jeans, tickling the little Wylde blondie boys in Target, praying for spare time, and I'm all out of chocolate chip cookies.
But I'm not looking at those scribbles. Or the stretched out denim. Or the empty tupperware.
I'm looking up.
Up towards the sun illuminating the earth through bare trees. The same sun that overcomes the clouds and bathes everything in warmth when we're shaking in the mountain air. When we're shaking our way through this life trying to remember where it is we come from. When we're shaken over where we're going.
Up towards the Son who overcomes every problem we face before we even face them. The one who hung His precious life up on a tree... for me.
Up towards the Rock that is Higher than I. Much higher.
At other people and their struggles. At our country and our issues. At our history and our flaws.
I've been so wrapped up in the ugly and somber realities of life that it's like I've been deprived of all overwhelming moments of gratitude. Life's been nothing to me lately but anger and bad words and tear stains and broken families and such. I don't even know the last time I had a God-Moment. Because literally EVERY FREAKING MOMENT OF EVERY FREAKING DAY HAS BEEN A FREAKING CHLOE MOMENT. Excuse my french.
But, I think He's been telling me that I could use a good shrinking. Like, bad.
He's been screaming it in my ears and hitting me in the back of the head with it--in the best "I love you so much Chloe Alexis Hunsbarger" kind of way.
So here I am praying to be itty-bitty. Praying that He'll just break me apart. Wide open--so He can put me back together filled with more of His Goodness and Grace. Praying He'll take my ugliness and chuck it as far as the east is from the west. And finally coming to grips with the true reality of life that maybe it's time to start looking up.
So now I'm writing the same letters I was a week ago, growing out of my jeans, tickling the little Wylde blondie boys in Target, praying for spare time, and I'm all out of chocolate chip cookies.
But I'm not looking at those scribbles. Or the stretched out denim. Or the empty tupperware.
I'm looking up.
Up towards the sun illuminating the earth through bare trees. The same sun that overcomes the clouds and bathes everything in warmth when we're shaking in the mountain air. When we're shaking our way through this life trying to remember where it is we come from. When we're shaken over where we're going.
Up towards the Son who overcomes every problem we face before we even face them. The one who hung His precious life up on a tree... for me.
Up towards the Rock that is Higher than I. Much higher.
